Marriage: Mis-defined, Missed Opportunity

I tried an interesting social experiment yesterday.  As Facebook began to show lots of red equal signs displayed by those looking for what they call marriage equality, I decided to make my own little graphic.  A little blue-on-blue cross.  With it I specified that I was not presenting this as a rebuttal against the red equal signs, but rather an affirmative message of losing oneself and one's rights to Christ and His life.  I sat back and waited to see what would happen.  I didn't ask or even suggest anyone repost it.   When a pastor friend reposted it, I did suggest that he include my explanation text, which he had already done.

As the day went on, I watched it spread a little.  Soon enough, the supporting text was gone and in some places, it was replaced with a rejection of "marriage equality" and a statement of "one man, one woman."  Yep, now it was not a message about turning to Christ, it was a statement about applying the Bible to our politics.   Isn't that OK?  Well, in a general nice American Christian way I suppose it is.  But, here's my issue.  We are missing the boat, especially in this time of social change/upheaval as the American culture goes through another big shift.  Our culture could use the morality that can be extracted from the Bible.  The lessons one can take from the Bible are good for society.  BUT, the point of the Scriptures is not morality and nice society, the whole point is JESUS.

"You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; it is these that testify about Me; (John 5:39)

So, first let me say that I think the Christian message has tended to Mis-Define marriage as badly as we accuse others of trying to.  Biblical Marriage is NOT "one man, one woman"  it is One Christ, one man, one woman!   Unless Christ is the center of the marriage relationship, followed by a man and woman who are seeking to die to self and serve Christ, it is not a true "Biblical" marriage.  The current cultural desire to redefine marriage misses the mark not just by ignoring that the Bible explicity condemns homosexuality, but making marriage about personal rights instead of the giving up of rights.

A Unless the LORD builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; (Psalms 127:1a)

God created marriage as a picture of His relationship to His people.  (Eph 5:22-33).  Earthly cultures have grabbed hold of the idea and changed it, and the American church, lulled by a society that used to be friendly to the Judeo-Christian way of thinking, allowed itself to redefine marriage into something that is about two people who love each other romantically.  The American church began to drift away from the idea of covenant and service and toward compatibility and fulfillment.  With this drift, the church saw its divorce rate follow the world's divorce rate perfectly.  Now, finally, the church has realized that the world is defining things too far away from God's Word, but the church needs to not retreat to the 1950's, the church needs to retreat to the Word of God and get its own house in order.  We must rediscover that marriage is about a man and woman who, in love with Christ, come together in a lifetime covenant to serve one another and be bonded as one person.  We need to emphasize that without Christ, one man and one woman are still lost!  We must celebrate the uniqueness that is union with and in Christ and make sure that our marriages reflect not Normal Rockwell but Aquila & Priscilla (Acts 18).

This is our Missed Opportunity.  The people of God need to stop attacking each unChristian, unBiblical thing the world does.  I'm not talking about accepting and condoning sin.  No way!  Rather, the solution to sin, especially rampant societal sin, is Christ, not christian ethics.  When we push Biblical morality rather than a transforming relationship with the Savior of mankind, we miss the opportunity.

For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified. (1 Corinthians 2:2)

This has informed much of how I do my pastor job these days.  I recently had an individual come to me whose "traditional" marriage was on the rocks.  In the old days I would have sat down and tried to give him some tips on loving his wife better and serving her more and some communication tools.  Anything to try to help.  I have realized that while that seems good and would in the short run even help a little, I would be treating the symptoms not the disease.  The disease that is destroying the marriage is not poor communication and selfishness, it is SIN.  I know of only one solution to that; the saving blood of Christ on the cross through surrender to God.  So that's what I told him.  I lovingly urged him to turn to Christ and start there.  THEN we could work through the things that will begin to flow from a right relationship with Christ.    I have abandoned christian social engineering in favor of the Gospel.

This is an opportunity to proclaim Christ!  When we say "one man, one woman" we, as Christians, leave out the whole point.  CHRIST.  Let's return to the point.

"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." (Matthew 28:19-20)