Fatherhood: Hands on

It has been a great weekend, but boy am I tired. Sarah left Friday morning to go down to Maryland for the weekend to see her sister and attend her nephew's dedication. The kids and I have kept a regular schedule and it has been fun to have them for the weekend. Of course, I am totally exhausted and I have all the more respect and admiration for how my wife is able to do this all the time. I do not know how single parents manage it all the time. The team-work aspect is really indispensable. Today I really got a lot accomplished. Did two loads of laundry, washed the kitchen floor, supervised the cleaning of the playroom, helped my daughter wash dishes, took the kids on a trip to Route 4 Pets to buy some new fish for our aquarium and to Save-A-Lot to pick up a little something for our special project tomorrow morning plus the sitting and holding kids and reading books that is part of having fun as a dad. Now we have a deacons meeting in an hour and I am tired! We are all looking forward to mommy coming home tomorrow and she should be surprised at the cleaning we got done. Now a note of commentary. I am a little surprised at the number of people who tell me that I am "brave" to take the kids for the weekend as if it is a strange and special thing for a dad to do. Perhaps it is in this culture, but I think that is a sad commentary on our culture. I have always objected when people call me having the kids "babysitting." I say, "we don't call it babysitting when my wife has them." We prefer to call it Parenting. Somehow we have turned the raising of children into woman's work. I don't believe that is even close to Biblical. The Bible puts the responsibility for children first and foremost on the father. This is so important to the Lord that failure to take responsibility in this area is evidence of a lack of ability to lead in the family of God. Even studies in the world show the importance of strong and supportive father figures. Now my wife is the primary caregiver to the children. I have a job (or two) and many responsibilities outside the home. This means that she spends more time with the kids than I do and does more direct teaching than I do, but that does not lessen my responsibility in the least. If anything, it increases my responsibility as I must make sure that I save enough time and energy out that my kids always feel that they have a primary place in my life and love. This is hard work. It is easy to allow the demands of ministry and others to capture too much of my time, but if I do not take regular time to connect to my kids, my relationship with them will be one of distance and disconnection. That is why I have thoroughly enjoyed this weekend as I have been primary care-giver. They have had a lot of my attention and we have had great connection times. It's almost like a retirement account. You should start investing early, investing often, if you want a good return later on. You can't wait until the end and hope you can put enough in to pay off.