End of Month-Perspective

It was a good day today.  Charlene's shower this morning and it is always encouraging to see the ladies of the church come out to spend time together and encourage a new mom.  Lots of cars in the parking lot today.  This afternoon we had the Dominican Republic Mission trip reunion down in Augusta.  Nate, Brian and I rode together and had some sweet fellowship in the car as well as enjoying seeing some friends from the trip at the reunion.

Tonight I got some time with Sarah just to sit and relax and talk.  It has been a busy few days.  Both of our souls are tired tonight.  There are times when you get tired and it is easy to feel discouragement creep in.   Reminds me of my past.......

When I was in high school and my first year of college, I struggled mightily with depression.  I didn't need medication or counseling.  I needed a Godly perspective.  I was a Christian, but I was focused squarely on me, what was wrong with me and what wasn't going right.  Others didn't treat me right, etc.   A physical manifestation of this was I tended to walk with my head down.  On bad days I would be watching my feet.  Good days, the ground out ahead.

I didn't realize I did that.

After God began to truly get hold of my heart and turn my attention outward towards others, when he redirected my thoughts away from how I felt and what I thought and focused me on how I could love others, my heart changed.  One day a friend politely asked me what had happened.  "What do you mean?" I asked.  He proceeded to tell me that he had noticed a change in my walk/posture.  "You used to keep your head down and slump your shoulders.  Now you walk with your head up.  What happened?"

I hadn't realized I had changed my walk.

I explained to him the work God had done in my life.

Although the days of depression are behind me, never to return, there are days when their shadow creeps back over me.  I can get discourged and feel defeated by things.  I mentally begin to stare at my feet again.  That is when I must refocus.  Tonight it meant updating some pictures on my Facebook for the express purpose of reminding me how blessed I am by my family.  I also looked up to the horizon, at the upcoming Men's Summit and Peacemaker Training at church.  At the (Lord willing) birth of our fourth child in June.  At all God is going to do in our lives in the life of our church this summer and fall.  I have watched God work in amazing ways in our fellowship this winter and spring.  It is only the beginning!

Eyes back on the horizon...off my feet.  Lord, may I keep my eyes on you, and off me.