Focus on the Family

No, I'm not referring to James Dobson's organization. I am thinking about Bean's Corner and the atmosphere we are looking to establish, encourage, and preserve. A lot of different people hold a lot of different ideas about what the church should be, how it should be, why it should be. There is plenty of truth in many of these ideas, but let me just ruminate a bit on the subject. The church is not an organization, with goals, benchmarks, and rules. It is an organism or a family. These are the two metaphors used in Scripture. A body or a family. When you see a church going through conflict or breaking down, it is rarely an organizational issue at heart. It is an issue of health and family. An issue of organization or governing may precipitate the issue, but the results are most often determined by relational issues rather than organizational issues. I have been in poorly managed churches that were filled with a feeling of love and well run churches that were not. I would rather be in a church that cares for me and allows me to love then one that is run coolly and efficiently. Often we forget that as we get caught up in trying to get the body to function. I have three children who do not always operate the way they should. They do the wrong thing or don't do the right thing the right way. Do I sacrifice my relationship with them in the name of correcting them? Of course not. It is a tough balance in a church. Sometimes stands must be taken and issues must be addressed. Not everyone will agree with everthing that needs to be done. When those times come, we must make sure that we are first and foremost affirming each other and increasing the ambient level of love that everyone is experiencing. That will in turn help people deal with whatever issue is at hand. Is this a cure-all? No, but the Bible says that love covers a multitude of sins. As members of the family, let's not ignore important issues, but let's not deal with them in a way that reduces or obliterates people's sense of love. Now one caveat. Sometimes tough love is hard for some people. My son told me today that he didn't like me anymore. The reason? I asked him to stop coloring on the kitchen table with a crayon (not on paper, ON the table). He was wrong. He needed correction. He didn't like it. I reminded him how much I loved him and that I didn't like having to correct him. Then I disciplined him. Then I told him that I loved him again. Love disciplines, as Nate reminded us yesterday. Just because tough love is hard on someone doesn't mean you shouldn't exercise that. Let us just always make sure we are seeking to remind people how much we love them.